• Yes, yes, I know. I promised to do the whole photo a day thing, but my computer will not load up the images from the disk. I need to take a look at that, but haven’t had the time to do so.
• For therapy I am keeping several diaries; I read back some entries yesterday and I scare myself with the thoughts that fly through my head
• I have mentioned to friends a couple of times that I want to get a tattoo; I have been saying that for almost 10 years actually, since my mother passed away, and now (well withing the next three months or so, after doing the proper research) it will finally happen.
• Yes I know I should post more, I’m just extremely busy with therapy and my head is on overload at times

Imagine yourself having to count all the stair steps, every single day, every single time you go up or down the stairs, imagine having to repeat a stentence or word 3 times in your head when thinking about things when you are laying down in bed, then imagine yourself having to add up the numbers that you see until you have a single digit number left (5+5+9=19=1+9=10=1+0=1).

These are just a few ways that the ‘performing tasks’ part of OCD manifests in me. Isn’t that tiring? Absolutely it is; nearly a 100% of the day this goes on in my head.

The causes vary from Psychological (unconscious conflicts which manifested as symptoms; for instance, avoiding feelings) or Biological (majority of researchers believe that there is some type of abnormality with the neurotransmitter serotonin, among other possible psychological or biological abnormalities; however, it is possible that this activity is the brain’s response to OCD, and not its cause)

I have a lot of different ‘performing tasks’; they may vary to the slightest thing (keeping the phone at a certain spot) to the biggest thing (doing everything in a certain order).

All these things manifest because consciously and subconsciously I am trying to keep my feelings, and thoughts away, and then trying to distract myself from doing the actual tasks.

I am tiring myself now.

If anyone wants to know more about this, and what it means for me (and want to know more about how this manifests in me) then leave me a comment and I’ll type up a little more.

I will also be typing some other things up that are part of my diagnosis.